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| Caught Up |
| 11.15.04 (8:13 am) [edit] |
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I had forgotten how pretty my blog was, and just how attached to it I became over the summer. To anyone out there who actually maintains a blog throughout the school year, does the therapeutic factor outweigh the time commitment? Sitting down and typing out non-school related thoughts is actually kind of grounding. It's something to consider. Perhaps something to keep me on this planet, and not fully enveloped by the world of computer engineering.
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| Backlogged Again |
| 08.16.04 (1:01 pm) [edit] |
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Finally winding down my summer. Since Berkeley, I've braved one LEGO filled month, headed home for a week, survived a tornado and two hurricanes, and made it back to Cleveland in one piece. I don't know what I was expecting of my summer, but in retrospect I think I've made the most of it. Too bad it only leaves me wanting to have a family. Equinox was an incredible experience, and the first time I've ever had a herd of little people following me around. They dubbed me the mother duck...followed by her trail of ducklings. Ehh...food calls, to be continued.
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| A month of change. |
| 07.13.04 (8:37 pm) [edit] |
I don't know why it surprises me so much that I haven't blogged in nearly a month. I've packed in an awful lot of living since that point, and just not a proportional amount of reflection. I'm not sure where that leaves me now, but I'm proud of how I've spent the past month. Reading through my past couple entries, I think I stopped posting about when I finally figured out Berkeley. My last two weeks were incredible.
I wonder how much I hurt myself by always running away on the weekends. I got a lot out of spending time with the family friends, but I also didn't make any close friends on campus. To be honest though, I don't think I would have anyways. I appreciate diversity, but we were just in two very different worlds. Too much for me to even handle. The last week was fun. I finally found a group that could be diverse, without being culturally exclusive. Thinking back though, it was a rather food filled week. Perhaps its good I didn't find them earlier. I would've emptied my wallet, and put on a good amount of weight. As the newly self-conscious girl in me comes out.
My last week there was fairly intense. I think my roommate was worried that I was dying. She started a tally of how much time I was putting into my final project. It was a bit sick, I would sit in my bed with my laptop and work for like ten hours on end. I wasn't really eating, so nature never really called, and I never had to get up. Mai counted up 61 hours between Friday to the following Tuesday. 20 of which had fallen on Monday. But yknow what? I finished my piece, and I made something I'm really proud of. That's about all I could have asked for. And I'm choosing not to post a link, because I feel like that would be hugely boosting myself up. We did presentations the last day, fairly run of the mill. The first thing Rinehart says in response, "How much longer will you be at Berkeley? We're starting a [url=http://art.berkeley.edu/nieme...]Center for New Media[/url] that would be perfect for you." Too bad for that. Turns out though that Case has the same idea. Well, similar enough. Our EECS department was just awarded a preliminary $400,000 to open a new [url=http://neohio.craintech.com/c...]Virtual Worlds[/url] lab. I must say I'm fairly intrigued. It's no Berkeley, but it's certainly enough to excite me.
Anyway, that was an era past. I watched more episodes of Sex and the City than I'll ever admit, but in the end, I came out with some memories. It may not have been the ideal, but it was certainly an experience.
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| Lasagna and Nutter Butters |
| 06.18.04 (4:07 pm) [edit] |
It's 5pm and I've only left my bed once today. I'm rather content though, and I feel surprisingly unpathetic. I think having a computer, a novel, and food all within reach of my bed sort of lends itself to that. I could really stay in bed forever. Perhaps I'll get out and sit in the sun for a bit. Maybe catch the bus down to Shattuck. [url=http://www.cleveland.com/best...]Strawberry Gelato[/url] sounds good about now...
So I've been all looking forward to being able to do a Friday Five, but this weeks questions happen to be crappy. So I'm doing another set instead. Artistic license. Anyway, here goes:
[b]
Friday Five[/b]
[b]1. If the world were to suddenly end right now, what do you wish you would have done?[/b]
[i]Given birth, and had the chance to hold my child in my arms.[/i]
[b]2. How many times do you hit the snooze button before getting out of bed?[/b]
[i]I am in all serious the most obnoxious person on this entire planet. I just feel bad that four other people are going to be subjected to living with me next year. Hitting the snooze button is my one big thing. I think the longest I've ever snoozed for is something like 7 hours. There's just no explanation for it, I'm terrible. On a day to day basis though, the very minimum is about 5 or so...an hour is the bare minimum of snoozing I need to get me out of bed in the mornings.[/i]
[b]3. What cartoon do you enjoy watching from the present (or the past)?[/b]
[i]Y'know, after years and years of dedicated cartoon watching, I'm realizing for the first that they just don't interest me anymore. Especially not Family Guy. It's a sad realization, but I can't think of a single cartoon I really enjoy watching. If you want my whole childhood rundown though, read back to [url=http://www.tblog.com/template...]a couple Friday's ago[/url] .[/i]
[b]4. If you could go to any time and/or place in history, where/when would it be?[/b]
[i]As a woman, I have to say that most of history isn't particularly appealing to me. Not in the rampaging feminist sense, but being woman in society really is a bit of a disadvantage. Based on that fact, I think I would really enjoy the 60's in the United States. Perhaps even Berkeley. I think I'd easily fall into being a flower child, it's just waiting to come out. I feel like that's such a cop out answer, given all the cool places and events in history. But as far as a time I'd wish to experience, and not just observe, my answer stands.[/i]
[b]5. If your life were a movie, what would it be rated and why?[/b]
[i]Aye, that's really not a fair question. Just for a bit of context, off of the [url=http://www.mpaa.org/movierati...]MPA Movie Ratings[/url] site,
"If nudity is sexually oriented, the film will generally not be found in the PG-13 category. If violence is too rough or persistent, the film goes into the R (restricted) rating. A film's single use of one of the harsher sexually-derived words, though only as an expletive, shall initially require the Rating Board to issue that film at least a PG-13 rating. More than one such expletive must lead the Rating Board to issue a film an R rating, as must even one of these words used in a sexual context. "
So by default then, I lead a very rated R lifestyle. My mother would be disappointed.[/i]
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| Reading Rainbow |
| 06.18.04 (12:08 am) [edit] |
For the sake of propriety, and because I promised someone I would:
[i]Slaughterhouse Five[/i] by Kurt Vonnegut
[i]The Poisonwood Bible[/i] by Barbara Kingsolver
[i]More Eric Meyer on CSS[/i] (I think it counts, I did read it)
[i]A Wrinkle in Time[/i] by Madeline L'Engle
[i]Flipped[/i] by Wendelin Van Draanen
[i]Hickory Dickory Dock[/i] by Agatha Christie
[i]The Da Vinci Code[/i] by Dan Brown
[i]Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban[/i] by J.K.Rowling
[i]The Golden Compass[/i] by Philip Pullman
[i]The Subtle Knife [/i]by Philip Pullman
[i]The Amber Spyglass[/i] by Philip Pullman
...[i]1984[/i] by George Orwell...
...[i]The Joy Luck Club[/i] by Amy Tan...
I may be forgetting one or two, but thats about the whole of it. Since I've gotten to Berkeley that is. Subtracting weekends, Sam's visit, and midterm craziness, I've averaged .9 books a day. I really have no right to complain about not having made any friends. Whatever, I'm enjoying myself. For the sake of setting myself a goal or two, here's what I have left for the summer:
[i]Bringing Down the House[/i] by Ben Mezrich
[i]Pledged: The Secret Life of Sororities[/i] by Alexandra Robbins
[i]Still Life With Woodpecker[/i] by Tom Robbins
[i]Tuesdays with Morrie[/i] by Mitch Albom
[i]Angels & Demons[/i] by Dan Brown
[i]Middlesex: A Novel[/i] by Jeffrey Eugenides
That's what I've got for now. Oh oh! That, and the rest of the Harry Potter's. If I get around to them. If any of you my loyal readers have suggestions to add to the list, feel free to comment. Now it's time to curl up with one of the ones I'm still treading through.
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| Restless |
| 06.17.04 (10:18 pm) [edit] |
Just had an awful phone conversation. You're going going going, and then someone says something wrong, and it's gone. Like irrevocably so. Just leaves you feeling so awkward, you put down the phone and it somehow just feels unfinished.
I'm sitting here with a million things to write about, but with my fingers just frozen in position. Seems I actually start out with my fingers on the home keys, and only gradually fall into the havoc of only typing with 6 fingers.
Class today was a lot of fun. The lecture was boring enough to where Jessica and I actually talked through class. It was a very wedding based conversation. I always surprise myself by how excited I get by the topic of weddings and such. I easily slide into that mode, and reality just isn't a consideration. I wish I knew if it was reality that encouraged it, or if it's my girlyness that encourages my feelings. Sometimes I just can't tell. I feel like everythings to unfounded to be real. If I question it, how do I even know it's there. It just makes me sad to think about.
On a more interesting note, one of the local Berkeley homeless has taken a fancy to me. I was sitting in the grass yesterday crocheting and eating, standard afternoon affair, and he wanders over towards me. Now this is your stereotypical, long bearded, dirty, carrying all of his belongings in what resembles a body bag, variety of homeless. Your usual. So he's walking along Bancroft (the main road) and detours to walk up to me. Stops a foot in front of me and starts staring at me. I finally look up, he gives me this incredibly intense glare, and wanders back to the sidewalk he came from. Continuing merrily along his way. So today, I'm sitting on another patch of grass, doing about the same thing. This time, he wanders up to me, stops and stares for a bit, and then proceeds to walk around me in a circle before he returns to his sidewalk. He does it again on his way back, except I was on my cell phone this time, so he doesn't stop to establish eye contact. Maybe it's more just that I wouldn't look at him. But again, a foot in front of my face, just kind of staring. I mentioned it to my mom, which I guess I shouldve known better than to do, and now my parents are all worried I have a stalker. Mind you it's weird, but still. Here's hoping it doesn't happen again. Maybe he just wants to be my friend?
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| Too much time... |
| 06.16.04 (6:54 pm) [edit] |
That should never be a problem, I can't believe I'm even complaining about it. After this weekend's Flash marathon, I'm sort of at a loss for what to do with myself. I almost just want to start reworking my project now, since I've already got the ball rolling and everything. It isn't due for another two weeks, but it's about all I can think about. My professor finally posted all of the [url=http://manray.bampfa.berkeley...~rick/classes/summer2004/ drafts/]class submissions[/url] today. It's impressive how hokey some of them are. The assignment was to take some large problem or question in our lives, and explore it in a multimedia way. Come out with something more than we started with. Mine was a sort of timeline based exploration, past and future, art and engineering. Throw in a little bit of the working mother conflict, and youve got a project. Jessica had a similar theme, but with a very different approach. I was really surprised by some of the projects. People just obviously not willing to get personal. One girl did hers on how she was going to get her bike here from LA. There was another with a circle just morphing into a cat. Weird. Regardless...I have no idea where to go from here.
I spent the better part of today laying out in the sun, crocheting and trying to read. For whatever reason, I can't seem to get into 1984. I know this is something I need to read, but after an inspiring and fast paced fantasy trilogy, Big Brother just isn't pulling me in. It's just very different from all the other books I've read this summer. I feel like it just doesn't fall into the category of light summer reading. I hate myself for even wanting that. The crocheting is going well though. I'd forgotten how therapeutic it is. I'm still at the point where I can either make it into a scarf, or into a bag for my laptop. I'll worry myself with that once I get past a full square. It's really nice though, being able to keep my hands busy, but my mind still active. It's an excellent medium for being able to take in everything around me. Once I get into the groove of it, I find myself enjoying Berkeley much more. I think it makes me more personable, perhaps more approachable. It's a very different feeling from burying myself into a book, it's me facing reality much more so than escaping from it.
I leave for Cleveland in 16 days. I promised myself I would start blogging again, start taking pictures, keep exercising, get reading again, and set up my website. Of those, I've gotten two going, and I've miserably failed at the others. But I have two weeks left. Probably the last time in a long time to just be able to work on myself, and my personal projects.
We also just got an email update of the [url=http://equinox.case.edu/]Equinox[/url] program. My class has 8 people registered for it right now. I'm a bit disappointed the class isn't any larger (there's only one girl :(), but at the same time, I think it will let me get really close to the kids. I'm so excited for the program to start, but it's going to be non-stop as soon as I get back to Cleveland. I suppose that is how I like it.
Back to my putzing about I suppose, maybe I'll even lay the groundwork for my page tonight. If I get motivated.
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| Brain Dead |
| 06.13.04 (12:07 am) [edit] |
Somehow the number of hits this site has gotten has practically doubled since the last time I checked...meaning in the past two days or something. I've gone from 400 and some hits to 707. It's like getting caught in traffic at two in the morning.
I'm at Danville now, working on my midterm until Tuesday. I figured I would get a lot more done out here than I would at Berkeley. Food and study breaks both come a lot more easily here. The two little ones have spent a surprising amount of time looking over my shoulder while I work. It gives me a constant commentary, which at times can be nice. Keeps me from working the way I did yesterday, 12 continuous hours staring into my laptop. It's tiring, but incredibly fulfilling. The little man on my bicycle is fully animated now and goes across his little cityscape...I've been working on it forever, and I've come up with maybe 10 seconds of animation. The 5 layers of imaging and 3 degrees of motion make me feel slightly better about life though. It just makes me have so much more respect for all the classic animators.
Lifewise, I don't quite know where to put myself right now. Given how much I love this class, I'm more at odds with what to do academically than I've been in awhile. I guess that's kind of what my project is about. Take the easy route, be unhappy, and settle with being an engineer. Or let myself explore, be creative, and not worry about that paycheck. It's very time based...I almost see the hands of a clock ticking by and coordinating with different areas of my life. Most people wait till retirement to be able to live out. I'm not sure I'm okay with that. I really just ought to rake in a high-salaried computer engineer and call it a day. Use my feminine wiles for something, and then let myself do what I want. Sam found an [url=http://www.usnews.com/usnews/...]article on US News [/url] that ranks the most promising engineering specialties. Among nanotechnology, nuclear, and biomed, also fell:
[i][b]Computer/electrical [/b]. Computer and electrical engineers, whose training gives them enormous flexibility, are in greater demand than any other type of engineer. Knowledge of electrical engineering, for instance, is essential for anyone who wants to pursue the popular fields of telecommunications and wireless technology. The Bureau of Labor Statistics projects that computer software engineering will be the fastest growing of all occupations until at least 2010. Computer and electrical engineers "can go into almost any industry," says Thomas Magnanti, dean of engineering at MIT. Starting salaries are around $63,000.[/i]
and slightly more of interest to me...
[i][b]Entertainment[/b]. Entertainment engineering involves creating special effects and sound-stage designs for films, concerts, theater, sporting events, computer games, and even theme parks. "Employers aren't looking for a formal academic experience; they're looking for where did you take initiative," says Jesse Schell, professor of entertainment technology at Carnegie Mellon University. Nevertheless, schools are introducing specialties in this field. Last fall, the University of Nevada-Las Vegas created the School of Entertainment Engineering and Technology to help fill a local shortage, while Carnegie Mellon has an Entertainment Technology Center aimed at both artists and engineers. The field can be difficult to break into and salaries may be lower than in other industries, but "people love this kind of work," says Geoffrey Orsak, executive director of the Institute for Engineering at Southern Methodist University.[/i]
The article is clearly sending me this message: I can get out there and have my fun, and my husband can be the one providing for the family with his ridiculously high starting salary. That sounds like the path for me.
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| Art? |
| 06.09.04 (3:33 pm) [edit] |
I'm not sure that I understand time based media. I just finished watching this piece called [url=http://www.yhchang.com/THE_ST...]The Struggle Continues[/url]. It's a required viewing piece for the class I'm taking...the whole theme revolves around "stark naked love". The piece takes you through sex in black and white text, filling the screen, ending with an orgasm. In pure text that is, with happy go lucky saxophone music playing in the background. I wish digital media wasn't such a hokey open ended field, it gives you such little starting ground.
Quick sidenote, the lab monitors station just started playing loud porn. It didn't sound as though they were expecting it to come on like that, it was very quickly turned off.
Back to work for me I guess. Exactly a week and counting until I have to submit my "life" explored in some multimedia respect. This should be fun.
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| Feeling nerdy |
| 06.08.04 (1:26 pm) [edit] |
My class is so incredible. Really, all I want to do is sit and play on my computer all day. I know I'm a huge nerd, but I really enjoy this...and I could be really good at it. Flash is such a neat medium, the sky really does become the limits. I really enjoy being able to think back and forth in multiple dimensions, it let's you accomplish so much more.
I wish this campus had a wireless network. I'd give anything to be able to sit outside in the sun and play. I guess technically they do, but their network doesn't seem to be nearly strong enough to keep me happy. It's okay though, I have my music and my new down comforter in here to keep my mind off how beautiful it is outside. Besides, I've already given in to being antisocial. It's not like this is any new.
Alright, I'm off to some shape tweening! God, this is so much fun. Maybe switching to CompE isnt a terrible idea? If anyone has some life altering advice that'll help me decide on a major or a career for that matter, feel free to leave me a message. Just looking for a cross between artsy and geeky. Is that too much to ask for?
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| Change of pace |
| 06.04.04 (1:25 pm) [edit] |
I've been reading through livejournals and xangas and such, and I've sort of been evaluating how my own voice must sound. I know I'm overly critical of how people blog, but I'm about as bad as they come. So, I'm gonna do a quick Friday Five, and then get to work on actively getting out of this rut. We're gonna shower, shave, and perhaps hit the town. Besides, Harry Potter comes out tonight, I could take the kids out to see it. That would probably put me back in my place some. Back to making myself think a bit:
[b]Friday Five, (If you...)[/b]
[b]1....owned a restaurant, what kind of food would you serve?[/b]
[i]How nice and broad. My dad has always had this idea that he would open a restaurant called "Under One Roof." Mind you this isn't something he actually plans on doing, it's just something he talks about endlessly. There would be different rooms, with different cultural themes, and different menus. The menus were all cross referenced, but the primary page was of the nation you were in. If I'm not mistaken, the menu's were all on computer screens that would pan in front of you. Partially to allow for an ever-evolving menu. So now what kind of restaurant would I open? Something fun. Maybe a diner-style, drive-through, skating-waitress type of joint. But with real food. Or, oh wait! I would probably open a themed fondue place. Not your traditional romantic place, but something with a bit of character. A place you'd wanna take your kids. Yes, that's what I would do. Hmm...that almost sounds like too much fun.[/i]
[b]2....owned a small store, what kind of merchandise would you sell?[/b]
[i]Again referencing my parents, the business my mom is starting up is oh so very cool. For those of you who don't know yet (as if anyone actually reads this), she's opening up an artsy tea house. Sort of like a coffee house, minus the coffee, where all of the cups are hand-made ceramics. Catch is that you get to make them yourself too. There are maybe five different styles you can paint and go crazy with, and then they fire them and return them all at once. Monthly tea parties to return all the fired goods, it sounds all around very cool. Okay, but if I were to open a store of my own. I'd probably open a sciency kids store. Yknow, with all those kits, and cool toys, and science museum discovery store kind of stuff. I always really enjoyed all that.[/i]
[b]3....wrote a book, what genre would it be?[/b]
[i]A kids book. I guess that's probably not what the question is actually asking, but that's what I would do. I would write and illustrate a childrens book, if not write and illustrate my own pop-up book. There's a pop-up edition of Alice in Wonderland out there that everyone of you should go and check out. It's the most mesmerizing thing I've ever seen.[/i]
[b]4....ran a school, what would you teach?[/b]
[i]You know what the problem is? I could really see myself teaching any number of classes, history and science aside. Although even science, I would enjoy that at any age level prior to high school. Is that a problem that I could really see myself teaching? Why the hell am I an engineer? But really, I would have an incredible time teaching art or english. Or no wait, just as an elementary school teacher. Shaping kids all around. Yes, that would be awesome.[/i]
[b]5....recorded an album, what kind of music would be on it?[/b]
[i]Hmm, that's a hard one. I'd like to think it wouldn't fall into a regular genre, but I see it being somewhat acoustic with an Indian twist. And a viola in the background. I mean, if I'm recording, I have to be able to have fun with it. And that's sort of what gets me going.[/i]
On a somewhat bizarre note, Laura Nahmias, my long-lost best friend from TIP just IMed me. Apparently David and Bill, the dynamic duo of Duke East 2000 just emailed her together, from a camping trip. Apparently they've managed to stay in touch. Makes me want to go off and reinstate contact with all those lost friends. Really were the best relationships I've ever had, and a somewhat utopian couple of summers. What happened to not just reminiscing, and getting out there and living some?
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| Tired |
| 06.03.04 (11:57 pm) [edit] |
I wish I knew how to tackle this place. I've always enjoyed the opportunity to pick up and replant myself, but somehow, this is beyond my means. Amy insists it isn't me, and that it's somehow a fault of the masses. If it wasn't for the fact that I've holed myself up I would almost be inclined to agree with her. So conclusion for the day, I'm in a rut and I need to get out of it. But really, the majority of conversations I do have just leave me wanting to scream. I promise I'm not a negative person.
My roommate just wandered in...the cute one. I really do like her, although she's managed to find her place with the international kids. There's just no point in making that distinction anymore. Really, unless I state otherwise, they're from another country.
Time for bed. Tomorrow's a new day. Perhaps a little more human interaction in store for me.
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| Week Two |
| 06.02.04 (6:18 pm) [edit] |
I'm exceptionally frustrated. Pro account settings were taken away, and just as I had gotten used to them. I guess that is how they lure you in. Now all I want is a CSS customizable template. It makes me so uneasy to see these tables, even if I am doing the best I can with them. Is it worth shelling out the cash? There's no way to tell if I'll continue posting through the school year. Although in that respect, paying for a Pro account will certainly make me update.
I'm have a surprisingly difficult time finding my groove at Berkeley. It's affirming two things, that I very much need good company, and that I dislike the majority of personality types. It's not that I'm negative, it's just that I have some standards in place. Right? Seriously, these people are 20 years old. Hella is not an acceptable word. There is no reason to be having parties every night under the guise of study sessions. If you're gonna have a good time, just call it that and go with it. People annoy me.
On the plus side of things, class is still amazing, and I've managed to meet at least one intriguing human being. Every interesting conversation I've had so far has been with an art major. Mph. I hate being an engineer.
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| Stretching Out |
| 05.26.04 (2:50 pm) [edit] |
Boy from yesterday made fun of me for lying on the same patch of grass reading. If it wasn't for the fact that I had a different book in my hand, I think it looked like I hadn't moved in the past 24 hours. I've graduated from [i]Flipped[/i] to Agatha Christie. I think that's movement enough.
I'm really intrigued by my class. We went over the building blocks of computers today, bits, bytes, pixels and the such. Somewhat dry and mundane, but somehow still interesting. I felt like such the left brain drowning in a sea of artists though. A girl raised her hand to ask how 3 bytes equaled 1.6 million pixels, when 1 byte only equaled 256. The professor stumbled about for a bit, tried out the word algorithmic, gave up, and left it to me. Exponential. Algorithmic, is that even a word? I feel like he meant logarithmic. My approach may be slightly more technical than the average, but it still seems like an incredible class. The technical world meets the art world, see, it really does exist.
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| Two Weeks Disconnected |
| 05.24.04 (5:18 pm) [edit] |
I can't even begin to go over life since my last post. It's a completely different world, Cleveland and May 8th feel like a universe away.
I left Case, said goodbye, and had a wonderful last night. Downed a bottle of champagne under the stars. At the expense of sleep, watched Good Will Hunting and drowned in beignets and powdered sugar. Finished off my box of beignet mix, working on finding another.
Ten days at home. Went camping with a mob of people, took up three sites and eight tents. I was the only person between the ages of 7 and 40. Spent some quality time curled up in a hammock reading. Sometimes it's nice to be the only one you know. A constant day of hide and go seek, and cradling to sleep. Came to the conclusion that I'll never be able to be a working mother. It's too much for nowhere near enough. For being just 19, a child in my arm's is way too comforting.
Got together with Brett, Jennifer, and Margaret. And Eryn Nicole, the five-month old extension to our group. Best friends split apart in a million directions. Caught up on the births, the deaths, and the marriages. Felt very much like a reunion, very First Wive's Club. Brett just got a fellowship, pays for all of Yale, her Master's, and guarantees her a job for her first 5 years out of school. Anywhere in the world. Jennifer is working full-time for the Sun's, and still learning how to date. Margaret, Margaret impresses me. She has a real job, she's moving out this summer, and she's supporting herself and Eryn. Taking evening classes to bat. I hope she holds through. And myself? I'm just trying to stay afloat.
And then there's my parents. My mom's starting her own business, my dad's retiring, and the world's turning upside down. I wish I could be home for my mother's sanity, and unbelieveably grateful I'm not for my own. Went out to dinner. Can't even describe the evening thereafter. Probably the first time with my family where I could feel my heart breaking for the sake of someone else. And there's absolutely nothing anyone can do.
On a lighter note, had the most perfect clubbing experience ever. Went out to Bourbon Street with Jennifer. For anyone back at Jax, if you get the chance, definitely head out there. There was this one guy that caught my eye early on in the night. Very attractive, very confident, an incredible dancer with an incredible smile to match. (Sam, I promise I do love you.) Three hours later he wanders over to me, and we have an incredible night to the likes of Love Shack and Come on Eileen. British, an officer of the Royal Navy, and oh so charismatic. Don't even care if he was full of lines, it did a number on my confidence. Sadly, come the end of the night, the boy had to be turned down. It would've been an interesting night.
Spent my last night in town with Amy. It was nice, really comfortable. We have our ups and our downs, but I think what keeps drawing us back together is that we really do have the same hopes and aspirations, and the same problems and fears. It was a good way to end off my time home.
And now, now I'm at Berkeley. That's another post in itself. I'm still finding myself. My class sounds amazing, and it's just a matter of everything falling into place. I may be nervous, but I certainly feel alive.
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| Cardboard boxes. |
| 05.08.04 (1:04 pm) [edit] |
The suite's empty. The building is down to seniors, and maintenance staff. With the exception of the straggling few doing their laundry, there's no one else around. Today is the Cedar Point for senior week, so even those that could be around, are out. Awfully lonely around here.
I'm surrounded by cardboard boxes and laundry. It's enough to make a girl sad. All I've wanted for these past few weeks is to go home, and now I wish I could stretch this weekend out a bit longer. I just took off my bedding, and it's like this final goodbye. I'll never be able to watch a movie I've downloaded on my computer again.
There's a lot to look forward to though. The summer has a lot to offer. Berkeley should be an adventure, and Equinox will be me totally in my element. The five-pack? Who knows how that will turn out. Estrogen overload, I'm sure, but I'm expecting to create a lot of memories in that room. An obligatory rite of passage, if you will. We'll definitely have our ups and downs, but it'll be an experience. Living in the house period, I'm really looking forward to it.
My laundry should be done by now. Am I still reluctant to pack it away? Sure.
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| It's a new era... |
| 05.06.04 (8:06 pm) [edit] |
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Being an RA could stop now, tonight would be just fine. Check-outs non stop all day tomorrow, from 9 till 4 in the afternoon. Running up and down an 11 story building. All I want now is my gelato, and perhaps an episode of Sex and the City.
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| Post finals. |
| 05.04.04 (10:23 pm) [edit] |
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Tonight was my gfo out post finals fnight. First time since December I believe. Not ognonoa liem, fairly phenomenal regardless. I'll proabv.y edit this later for stupid typos/stupid sentences/stupid thoughtas auin gerneral. I love Amanda. Even if she does pass out after our trip to visit our next door to each other boyfriends. Time to pass out. Real update tomorrow. I promise. Becauisdeu this obvioulsy sint functional. Mmmm. Salute peace!
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| Mmmmm.... |
| 05.04.04 (7:12 am) [edit] |
So my skipping yesterday somehow doesn't break the whole *a blog a day in may* bit. It's still only been 36 hours since the last post, and 7 consecutive hours of those were spent in final land. (Needless to say, everything else was broken up between studying and sleeping. Oh the exciting life I lead.)
Kristin's away message says it's a beautiful day outside. I'm always reluctant to beieve a statement like that, especially from the jaded Cleveland perspective. My OCD [url=http://www.weather.com/weathe...]online weather [/url] checking heartily disagrees. 51 degrees. As good as it feels to be done with school, all I want is to be able to get in a tank top, and wander around barefoot in the sun.
Eh. Let's not get too optimistic here. Crawling back into bed to catch up on even more sleep.
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| Sorbonne Graffiti |
| 05.02.04 (4:51 pm) [edit] |
It is forbidden to forbid. Freedom begins by forbidding something: interference with the freedom of others.
The Revolution must take place in men before occurring in things.
A single non-revolutionary weekend is infinitely bloodier than a month of permanent revolution.
Life is elsewhere.
The more I make love, the more I want to make the Revolution, the more I make the Revolution, the more I want to make love.
[b]The thought of tomorrow's enjoyment will never console me for today's boredom. [/b]
[i]And in all the hypocrisy of the life I lead, I go back to studying for finals. Perhaps not today, but tomorrow I start over. [/i]
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| the first of May |
| 05.01.04 (8:37 pm) [edit] |
So Sam does this weird thing every once in a while, where he decides he's giving up Coke for a month. He's fairly addicted, and at his worst, he was probably downing 4 a day. Not terrible, but he's still rather dependant. He just broke his *April, no soda for a month* this afternoon, and wanted to start something new and fun for May. I guess something to start off the summer on the right foot. The only twist, instead of giving up a bad habit, pick up a good one. So we agreed on a blog a day. For the month of May, he and I agreed that we would have to update everyday. I suggested sit-ups, and he reminded me that there was no way we would actually do sit-ups before the end of the day.
If I was really ambitious, I would add in a picture of the day as well. Considering the half hour left for today, I somehow don't think that's going to happen. Although there is this awfully picturesque bouquet of pink roses sitting in a glass coke bottle right next to me. If only my camera had batteries in it. So yes, here's to a good month. And once finals are over and done with, here's to a hopefully stunning layout as well. Alright then, time to conquer this headache and get back down to business. Numerical Methods here I come.
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| Friday Five |
| 04.30.04 (2:44 pm) [edit] |
So I started this blog on a Wednesday, and my first thought was that I wished it was a Friday. There has been very little going on in my life outside of Statics and Chem. And nothing really in the near foreseeable future outside of Quantum Mechanics and Numerical Methods. I wanted to start this thing on a Friday so that I could fill out a Friday Five. Make myself stop and think for a second instead of droning on about the wonders of my life. But of course, the [url=http://www.fridayfive.org/]webpage[/url] is down and all of the archives have been taken down as well. Regardless, I scrounged one up, I'm being stubborn, and I'm doing it:
[b]Friday Five (3/5)[/b]
[b]What was...
1. ...your first grade teacher's name?[/b]
[i]Mrs. Kalna. She stayed one of my favorite teachers through elementary school. I haven't the slightest clue why. I'd like to think that it was something about her as a teacher, and not just the toys in the corner or the fact that some of my best friends to this date I met in her class. I remember talking to her about my dreams, candy filled fairy lands, very 6 year old girl...and her telling my parents how imaginative I was. I remember thinking that was weird, even back then.[/i]
[b]2. ...your favorite Saturday morning cartoon?[/b]
[i]There were so many era's...it's almost impossible to break it down to one. I must have gone through at least 5 full turnovers of the Saturday morning line-up. I started setting my alarm and dragging myself and my blankie down there at 7 every morning. That was the DuckTales/Rescue Rangers era. I vaguely remember CareBears before then, but that's even a bit too far for me. I think after that we segued into a bit of the Ninja Turtles, with a little bit of Captain Planet in there. There was also the superhero phase, I was all about X-Men and Spiderman. I distinctly remember Saturday mornings tapering off when I would wake up later and later because I was too cool to watch the animated ones. I'd watch the real people shows, Saved by the Bell reruns and such. Those didn't start till 10, so I didn't even have to get up early. That's when everything started going downhill.[/i]
[b]3. ...the name of your very first best friend?[/b]
[i]Sarika. Our dads went to college together, and then got jobs with the same company. They were both transferred to Jacksonville at the same time, and we've been there ever since. We actually moved into the same apartment complex...I was about 2 and a half. We would play together every day, and spent a year at the same Montessori pre-school. Interestingly, we stayed best friends until we finally went to school together again. Wasn't until high school. [/i]
[b]4. ...your favorite breakfast cereal?[/b]
[i]Lucky Charms if I remember correctly. Makes me feel SO old...everytime I pick up my Honey Bunches of Oats, or my Special K. I swear, they're good cereals, I'm not just growing up.[/i]
[b]5. ...your favorite thing to do after school?[/b]
[i]Geez Louise. So this is obviously geared towards elementary school, but all I can remember is riding the Activity Bus home everyday from middle school, and in high school having my dad pick me up after work. Theater, NAHS, Scholar Bowl...whatever, I was one of those overall nerdy involved kids. The majority of the time I would get home just in time for dinner. Oh wait, yea...there's the common trait. My favorite thing to do after school was to raid the refrigerator, find something microwaveable, and spend thirty minutes with my after school cartoons. That went on for along time. I find free time, and food finds me. Nothing's changed.[/i]
Alright, time for dinner. The Sandcastles are taking out the new additions to our family. (It sounds like such a cult...) My one free night for the weekend, and then getting back down to studying.
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| Finals |
| 04.29.04 (5:51 pm) [edit] |
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One down, three to go. I'm waiting for my 96 review pages for tomorrow to print out. Twelve hours and counting to my next final. I really do question how much I'm meant to be an engineer. They keep saying that it will get better. The "getting better" has yet to kick in. It's not the workload that bothers me, it's the sheer monotony. You'd think that a three hour final would be somewhat satisfying, knowing that I've learned something and that I can apply a semeter's worth of skills. Instead I just pass out in the grass, not being able to appreciate anything but Cleveland's first day of 80 degree weather. Keep on chugging, Monday, 3:30 pm.
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| Take two |
| 04.28.04 (3:16 pm) [edit] |
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I think this makes for blog attempt #5. The first two didn't have enough features, the third wasn't customizable enough, and the fourth was simply too much work. A new look shouldn't require learning three new languages. Hopefully with the end of finals I'll be able to invest some time into this. The only main disadvantage of the basic account is that it doesn't allow for image hosting. I'm looking into [url=www.photobucket.com]Photobucket[/url] to see if that can be compensated for. Basic goal is to not spend any money and still get everything I want. High expectations? We'll see.
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